You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. Robin Williams

Location: Kentucky, United States

Wednesday, April 02, 2003


“I would like two regular hamburgers, a medium fry, a medium chocolate shake, and a large coffee.”

“Sir, is that a large coffee or a Super-Size™ coffee? We have changed our coffee sizes. We used to serve small and large coffees, but now we have large and Super-Size ™. Do you want a Super-Size ™ coffee instead?”

I had been up since two-thirty that morning and still had an hour-plus drive to get home. I’ll sign the lawsuit waivers, just give me the whole pot with a straw. “Yes, I would like a Super-Size ™ coffee to go.”

As she is getting my order together she tells me that they have only recently changed sizes and not all McDonald’s ™ are using the new sizes yet. If I go to another McDonalds’s ™ instead of asking for a large or a Super-Size ™, I should just ask for “THE BIGGEST COFFEE YOU HAVE” ™.

She assembled my order and brought my coffee. I picked the cup up off the counter and looked it over. “Wait a minute, this is the same size as a large coffee.” She grabs a smaller cup out of the dispenser and holds it up. “No, this is a large, that is a Super-Size ™.” “I understand that,” I say “but the Super-Size ™ is the same size as the large used to be.”

“Well, yeah,” she says, “they just changed the name to make it sound like you get more.”


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